…I find it truly amazing sometimes at how much work can go in to looking like there was barely anything done on the site. Sheesh!

One of these days soon, dear readers, I’ll figure out how to get that damned audio player up, and when I do – oooohh, the plans I have for putting sound on the site! I know that it must just be something simple and small, and when I finally do figure it out it will be the ‘duh’ heard ‘round the world.

With the old BT site that I built it was a piece of cake, but the old site was also extremely limited in what I want to be able to create – so while I was putting the issues together on that, a dear friend took it upon herself to build me this shiny new Big Top site as an absolutely wonderful gift, but since I wasn’t there in the building of it I pretty much need to teach myself how everything works from scratch back here in Klown Alley, and while this site is absolutely mad with all the things it can do, it makes working on the back end of it just ridiculous. It seems as if sometimes logic has been completely thrown out the window, and trying to figure it out is like trying to learn how to tie a very intricate knot by just looking at it after the damn thing has already been tied. Your loving Ringmaster is losing his marbles – and hell, I didn’t have many to begin with in the first place, at least according to some people…

Hang true by me, though, and I will get it figured out, damnit – as well as many other things for you to play with.

Ya see, I want this to be much more than just a “magazine”. I want it to be a completely amazing, beautiful and interactive piece of art, and really, nothing less. Can ya dig it? If it were just for me, then that would be different – but it’s not.

A magazine is simple. Simple, mundane, and when it comes down to it, not what you would actually call exciting – and below what you deserve. I want Big Top to be worthy of not only my talents (humbly said) but you, the reader, the beautiful people I interview for it, and, of course, my advertisers! Without them, and the rare gift of financial support, I literally wouldn’t even be able to afford this pad of paper to write on. As the sole employee, from Ringmaster-ing to article-ing, from site tweaking to being the shoulder to cry on when the site tweaks me back – even down to the lowly job of getting the Ringmaster his coffee – well, there just isn’t any time in the day or night to do anything else to try and bring in a few extra coins, so the advertisers are it – and I gots to have a kickass “magazine” to keep all of us happy – and baby, the ideas are swimming around like crazy in this Sea between my ears, (usually popping in there between two and four in the morning) and I’m willing to do whatever it takes to continue to make this the best for you.

It’s my crazy dream, my gift to the world, to the dreamers – and I’m determined, serious, and devoted to it being the best it possibly can for you, which essentially is nothing less than the people you find in it, from the performers to the advertisers, to everyone who busts their asses to make their dreams into reality.

Being called a dreamer, more often than not, is spoken with a touch of criticism. “Oh – he’s just a dreamer, won’t amount to anything…” usually by those who have never had the courage to chase theirs, confined to the programming of the evening news on Fox, the security of their bedside alarm clocks and regular meal times (well, um - ok – I admit that meals are pretty damn nice every now and then,) and those who live their ‘regular’ lives, kept tethered by the mundane nine-to-five and their Starbucks socials, only to wake up the next morning and do it all over again tomorrow…

But – there’s something happening. I see it more and more, and I’m sure you do as well. There seems to be something of a Revolution goin’ on, baby! A quiet one, much more personal than a crazy bang the drum down the middle of the street thing, but it’s here, and it’s friggin’ growing!

 Bit by bit people are waking up, and looking up, with a new shine in their eyes. Hell, in the people I’ve had the amazing honor and pleasure of interviewing and/or talking with for Big Top, most of them – including the former Mercedes driving, Donna Karan suit wearing account executive who is writing this –  (though it was a really cool old ‘70’s Mercedes named Marlena, as in Dietrich – a tough old german broad with tons of class) we’ve all been nine-to-fivers, but realized that as long as we held onto that job, that security – unless we truly committed everything to ourselves and our dreams, then who we actually are would never be anything more than an amateur hobby. Who we are would need to be postponed because the security made us work late; what we loved to do and lived for would be pushed aside because we needed to wake up early to work for someone else, who perhaps did the exact same thing for someone else, and so it went up the work rope. Sometimes even our relationships suffered – and more frequently than not we had no idea why we felt miserable. I know I certainly didn’t, not for a very long time, and it took having the Universe, or whatever you choose to call it, give me an incredibly swift kick in the ass to wake me up.

Finally, we realized the sacrifices we were making to hold on to that bit of security (which is getting more and more to be a false bit), pulled our dreams and ourselves out of the noose at the end of the work-rope that we were holding onto, and decided that the sacrifices that would need to be made to follow our dreams (…and yeah, there are sacrifices. I haven’t always lived in a motor home and wondered where my next meals were coming from – but I must admit, it’s certainly always an adventure…) and the fear we would have to confront in order to keep going –

are worth more than anything – anything, at all.

It’s a hard fight, a lot of the time – but when someone tells me how much they like Big Top, or I feel like it might have made even the smallest amount of difference in the world, then, for those moments, I forget about everything else - and this crazy friggin’ circus called life – well, it just makes sense to me. Finally.

Big Top is dedicated to those people, the ones who are chasing their dreams and making the world a better and more beautiful place because of it, and having a friggin’ BLAST doing it!!!

as well as the others who are ready to let go of that rope, and hopefully might be inspired by something in here - What are you waiting for?

 Hell - Big Top is dedicated to EVERYONE!

Wow – went on a wee little rant there, didn’t I? I’ll be interested to see what your responses say, if anything.

Anyway, I hope that you enjoy this thing I’m doing – and thanks for stopping by!